Vive La Difference – Conversation

16 Jun 2010 by Dear Bad Dad, No Comments »

Yin and yang.

Oil and vinegar.

Wile E. Coyote and The Roadrunner.

THIS is “Vive La Difference,” an occasional post about those total opposites who are wholly dependent upon one another, better known as Moms and Dads.

CONVERSATION – MOMS

The Setting: A Playground.

Two Moms strike up a chat as their children play.

MOM #1

How old is yours?

MOM #2

Morgana’s four point nine.  Yours?

MOM #1

Polyhymnia’s four point six.

[Bad Dad note – What in the name of the Gregorian Calendar ever happened to “four and a half”?]

MOM #2

What a lovely name.

MOM #1

Oh, thank you.  She’s the Greek Muse of choral poetry.

MOM #2

Where will Polyhymnia go to school?

MOM #1

Still deciding.  We’ve already been accepted at Miss Riefenstahl’s Girls’ Academy, Muffington Country Day, and Crossroads.

MOM #2

My friend’s son goes to Muffington.  The immersion Esperanto program is marvelous.  Morgana’s already been accepted to Vestal Prep.

… and they’re on their merry way: chatting, reminiscing (Dads: if you thought episiotomy stories were too much information, think again), and comparing child-bearing and -rearing notes with more than just a soupcon of one-upswomanship for the next two point eight hours.

Numbers are exchanged.

Playdates are playdated.

They’re BFF’s.

That is, until Mom #1 serves Kroger-bought dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets for lunch instead of Mama Planet Brands’ Faux-ltry Vegan “Chik’n Nuggetz”.

The ensuing silence between them is deafening.

CONVERSATION – DADS

The Setting: A Playground.

Two Dads strike up a chat as their children play.

DAD #1

How old’s yours?

DAD #2

Four.  Yours?

DAD #1

Same.

DAD #1

Cool.

DAD #2

Cool.

VIVE LA DIFFERENCE!

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